Neon Genesis Evangelion

 

Disclaimer: NGE owns me.. but I don’t own the show…

 

A/N: Sorry if it took so long, for those that have been waiting, if any… but, I must say, Writer’s Block sucks. I’m sorry, I’ll try to make this one good…

 

 

 

 

Like breath. It actually felt as if someone was breathing very loud but at the same time very silent. The wind outside was howling, similar to a boy who was crying inwardly. Or, to put it in other words, Asuka couldn’t get to sleep. Hikari was sleeping breathlessly beside her on the ground. When Asuka had just arrived in Japan, she had trouble sleeping too, but that was due to the fact she had to get used to sleeping on the floor. Right now, she couldn’t use that excuse. She had been rolling to the left and to the right for about two hours since she went to bed. Asuka was getting quite annoyed because of it, but it had been this way ever since he got stuck…

 

Ever since Shinji got stuck in Evangelion Unit-01…

 

Asuka rose from her bed and rubbed her eyes. She cast one look at the sleeping form of her girlfriend before walking towards the bathroom. Once there, she watched her own reflection in the mirror and shook her head.

 

‘God, I look terrible…’

 

The bags that were only forming under her eyes were an indication that tomorrow would be an even more terrible day for her. She ruffed her own hair up a bit and splashed some cold water in her face. She watched herself again in the mirror and saw the look in her own eyes.

 

‘Damn… I actually look… sad..’

 

 

Payback Time

Chapter 6

 

 

Misato grabbed four beers, two in each hand and put them on the table. Hikari looked quite wide-eyed at the beers while Asuka just ate her breakfast. Hikari swallowed and looked at Asuka calmly eat her breakfast and then took a few bites herself. The atmosphere in the room was very breathtaking. Her eyes were still widened at the awkward breakfast situation.

 

‘This is just too… farfetched.. Something terrible has definitely happened…’

 

Hikari took a bite from her bread, swallowed and decided she had to ask questions now… She nervously glanced from Asuka to Misato as she prepared the question..

 

“Uhmm.. Misato?” Hikari glanced over at her, noticing that Misato put up a hand which motioned toward her she still had to finish another can of beer. “Asuka?” She gazed at Asuka, who was stuffing piece after piece in her mouth, though at a slow pace.

 

“Did someone die?”

 

Both Misato and Asuka stopped at what they were doing as they stared from the corner of their eyes, straight at Hikari. Hikari felt like a deer caught in a car light with no escape, it felt like they were penetrating her with just their eyes.

 

‘Well…. Judging from their..’ She gulped inwards. ‘looks… someone did die…’

 

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“So, you’re the new Commander, then?”

 

The man before her nodded as he walked past her. “I think I know of a possible solution for Shinji…”

 

Ritsuko looked puzzled as he stared at Fuyutsuki. “What… what do you suggest?”

 

Fuyutsuki turned around and gave her a genuine smile. “I believe love will light up the darkness…. In the Entry Plug… and in Shinji’s head, of course.”

 

Ritsuko looked sadly at the statement. “Heh…. You forget… there hasn’t been a person who Shinji knows who can give him that. The boy has been alone for so long, what you suggest seems like such an impossible task.”

 

Fuyutsuki chuckled shortly. “Yes. But you forget.. that his mother has returned…”

 

Ritsuko narrowed her eyes. She hesitated before speaking again. “… I have my doubts. Shinji-kun has never seen his own mother. In a wild frenzy, he might just kill her in there. If that would be the case, you’d have sacrificed an innocent life.” Ritsuko commented. ‘Although I don’t want to call Yui innocent… She is..’

 

Fuyutsuki grimaced. “Perhaps… But I believe Shinji remembers something before he reached age five. All that he could remember from then, would of course be his mother. Don’t you agree?”

 

Ritsuko chose to be silent and therefore, agree with him.

 

Fuyutsuki walked away, but not before saying another thing. “Yui will be able to walk again soon. We will ask her to cooperate when she has recovered. Another thing, Ritsuko, I want you to destroy the Dummy Plug…”

 

Ritsuko’s eyes widened. “But… the Commander..”

 

Fuyutsuki, who was already walking away, immediately turned around. “Rokubungi has nothing to say anymore! Besides, the Dummy Plug is useless now! There is no way it can control Unit-01… And.. I think there should be only one..”

 

Ritsuko nervously swallowed. She was quite happy she could destroy the Dummy Plug… but, if Gendo were to wake up soon… he would be quite pissed…

 

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“Alright… You deserve an explanation for our… strange behaviour, I guess…” Misato began, receiving a questioning glare from Asuka’s side. She ignored it and continued.

 

“Yes, someone did die…. That much we can assume now… we have tried several times to retrieve him…”

 

Hikari’s eyes widened. ‘Him? Oh my god… I hope it isn’t.. I hope it isn’t..’ Hikari began chanting inside of her that what she had assumed earlier would be wrong…

 

Misato continued. “But recently, we really tried everything and we still failed miserably.. He isn’t coming back…”

 

Hikari was afraid to ask, but the look in her eyes told Misato the question.

 

Misato smiled sadly as she stared off in space. Hikari gasped at the sad look in Misato’s eyes and Asuka, whose face was down. “Ikari Shinji… has died..”

 

Hikari tried so hard not to breakdown and was having trouble just breathing, her eyes, so widened, were beginning to water. The teeth in her mouth were shaking uncontrollably. Misato broke the silence by breaking down right in front of her. Hikari was to follow very shortly after. And even Asuka… wept..

 

Even Pen-Pen stayed in his home, although he hasn’t left his fridge for a few days now…

 

The three embraced each other for a very long time, no one knew how long.. Until Hikari suddenly spoke up.

 

“I…. I am going home, now….”

 

With a last hug, she left, her face still wet from the tears..

 

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“Toji. Get. Up. Now.”

 

Toji murmuring and rolling over on his other side, ignored his friend’s pleas.

 

“Jeez, you’re such a lazy bastard, you know that?” Kensuke stated. “You know what? I’m going alone, I don’t need you to go to the mall…. I can drool over the hot girl all by myself, thank you very much.”

 

Kensuke angrily walked out of the room. ‘My GOD!! Oh well, more girls for me, and I don’t want to be pushing his wheel chair today, anyway.’

 

Toji’s eyes suddenly popped open. “Hot girls?”

 

But Kensuke had already left..

 

“Where the hell am I?” A confused Toji asked as he stared around in the room.

 

Outside, Kensuke walked lazily. ‘Jeez.. It’s been so long since I’ve seen you, Shinji. When are you coming back?’

 

Kensuke frowned as he someone walk his way and he adjusted his glasses. ‘Hikari?’

 

Kensuke’s eyes widened even more and he had to adjust his glasses again. ‘She’s… she’s crying?!’

 

In a situation such as this, Kensuke was totally helpless. After all, he had never comforted a girl before. Hikari was approaching him fast and was still crying a bit. Kensuke grew nervous and Hikari was almost passing him, without even so much as a greeting. “Wa-Wait!! Class Rep!! No!! Hikari-san!! Aah… Hikari-chan!! Oh my GOD! What am I doing? Please wait!!”

 

Hikari turned around to face Kensuke. “What do you want, Aida?”

 

Kensuke paused and swallowed nervously. “Well… I’m sorry… I don’t have much experience with this… but.. I can tell something is wrong.. What.. what’s wrong?”

 

Hikari gazed sadly, but still hard through Kensuke’s eyes. ‘Toji… wasn’t he sleeping over at his place? They… they deserve to know as well…’

 

Kensuke sighed, assuming he wouldn’t get an answer. “I.. I’m sorry.. I.”

 

He was cut off as Hikari asked him a question and sniffed afterwards. “Where’s Toji?”

 

Kensuke frowned and looked confused as he answered her question. “He’s still asleep back at my place.. Why?”

 

Hikari turned around and started walking again, at which Kensuke looked even more puzzled than before. “Kensuke, follow me and I’ll tell you something…”

 

Kensuke followed her, still very confused. ‘This is just… too weird..’

 

Once Hikari arrived at Kensuke’s place, she ordered him to open the door. Kensuke complied and led her to Toji. Toji was awake when they arrived in Kensuke’s room and was surprised to see Hikari with Kensuke. He was still rather naked under his sheets and quickly covered himself up. Toji was about to yell a bit until he looked a bit closer at Hikari. Toji’s eyes softened a great deal as he noticed she had been crying.

 

“Ok, you two need to listen… you need to know this…” Hikari began, whispering.

 

Toji and Kensuke remained silent as the sadness that was stuck on her voice.

 

“You two.. also noticed Misato’s and Asuka’s…. behaviour, right?”

 

Kensuke and Toji both nodded nervously, not knowing what this was all about.

 

“Someone…. Died… someone..” Hikari paused. “Someone pretty close to you two.. ”

 

Kensuke’s eyes widened as he came to a conclusion..Nuh-No! You can’t be… You’re not saying!!”

 

Toji looked a bit puzzled at first at Kensuke, but was also thinking. And from observing Kensuke’s reaction, there wasn’t much to think about.. His eyes widened as well. “You can’t be meaning..!!” He swallowed ever so nervously as his fists were shaking. “No… he can’t… he can’t be gone..” He ended with a whisper as tears fell from his eyes.

 

Hikari couldn’t stop her own tears as she nodded and began to sob again.

 

“It can’t be…. not him…”

 

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“So.. you hurt too, huh?”

 

Asuka nodded ever so slowly at the purple-haired woman. “Of course I do!!” Asuka yelled. ‘But.. to think I would cry for him…. And I promised myself never to cry… Damn you, Shinji…’

 

“Well… At least there will be no more angel attacks.” Misato stated after wiping away a few tears. She was about to continue just when the phone began to ring.

 

They both stared at the damn thing, before Misato picked it up.

 

Asuka zoned out when Misato began to speak through the phone. ‘Shinji… though you’re still alive.. you will never come out, will you? And you will never be you again, right? I can’t believe that you are the first Pilot to fall… There must be a way..’

 

“Asuka. It seems they’re going to try something else.. to retrieve Shinji… and you and Rei have to be there as well. Let’s get going.”

 

Asuka nodded. ‘Another way to get Shinji back? Just another false hope… he won’t come back to m… to us..’

 

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“No, we won’t be doing it today. But you are here for a Synchronization Test. Today we will be telling you what we’re going to do, what we have planned to get Shinji back.” Ritsuko explained to Rei, Asuka and Misato. “It all depends on how fast Yui will recover.”

 

Misato and Asuka frowned, but it didn’t take a genius to find out what the plans were. Well, not long… for Rei.

 

“Ikari Yui will be piloting Evangelion Unit-01?” Rei questioned.

 

Ritsuko nodded with an expressionless face, where Asuka and Misato were still frowning. “Yes.”

 

Asuka stared straight at Ritsuko before asking her something. “You have to be 14 to pilot it, right?”

 

Ritsuko stared back and shook her head. “No, that’s not true. Let’s just say 14-year olds are easier to manipulate, or to control as one might put it.” She said as she gazed at Misato. “Anyone can enter an Evangelion, but not everyone can pilot it, 14-year olds are just the best. In Yui’s case, though she’s already older, she is the proof that an Evangelion can be piloted by an older person. We’re going to try that again, if all things go as planned, she’ll be perfectly recovered in five days, today she could already walk.” She said, mocking happiness. “Well, it’s time. Please, enter your respective Evangelions.”

 

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Somewhere else, the atmosphere was a whole lot different. The surroundings would indicate it was very cold, but in truth, it was quite hot. An occasional whisper interrupted the silence, which created a very disturbing picture. In here, there could be only one. Which means there can’t be any talking, or whispering. And yet, there is was again, another whisper. A hollow and sneaky whisper, ready to form into a thundering roar. Although a closer observation would tell otherwise. A change had occurred to the certain individual who was trapped inside the entry plug.

 

Ikari Shinji was alive, though now with two more inside of him, inside of his soul and mind, actually. Shinji had been divided in three parts now. Mind, Body and Soul. Though they were still one and Shinji was the main source of his own existence. Tabris or Kaoru Nagisa, was now in his Soul, though very strange, Shinji could easily get rid of him and gain full possession of his own soul. The same could be said about of Adam, who was now present in Shinji’s Mind. Shinji figured he could function as a guide, a conscience.

 

So, right now, he was having a discussion with his two new friends. Adam had been the one who told him where the scars on his face were for. And Kaoru was the one that knew what SEELE was about to do soon. But none of them told what was going on outside, what NERV”S plans were. He had self-control thanks to the seals on his body that he gained because of Adam, and he was now more calm than before, thanks to Kaoru’s nature, which he had absorbed.. at least, that was as much as he figured since he wasn’t about to lose control any time soon. But he remembered what he had done before.

 

No hard feelings, that was what both had said to him. It wasn’t his fault, they said. Still, Shinji felt guilt at what he had done to them, or to Asuka, Rei and even… father. He shook his head at himself as he was disappointed at himself again.

 

‘Shinji-kun. How many times do I have to tell you that you shouldn’t be like this.

 

“I know Kaoru.. But it’s true.. I’ve done nothing but disappoint others and ultimately myself… You can’t say otherwise.”

 

‘Through certain periods of a lifespan, one has to doubt oneself… although you have done nothing but…’

 

Shinji sighed. “Maybe… But I can do nothing else but blame myself.. since I’ve done everything I could’ve done so far, so very wrong..”

 

‘Not quite.. you’ve actually done great. Considering your own abilities in doing what you can, you’ve outperformed yourself because the situation forced you to. But the situation was just helpless and there was no other outcome.’

 

Shinji chuckled sadly, indicating that he wasn’t believing what he was hearing. “You say that now, but you haven’t seen it all.. You’re just trying to console me.. I don’t know why you’re bothering… You’re the one who says it doesn’t matter after SEELE’s attack anyway… Since everything will change after that… Third Impact as you so called it..”

 

‘Yes, you are right. But, you and many others will be alive afterwards. And it would be best if you’re not in the state you are in now when that time comes.’

 

Shinji sighed again. “So.. it is inevitable… I don’t think it’ll matter that much… you’ve explained what will happen… everyone will be different, yet we will all still know each other… I guess I’ll just hide from the world then, otherwise they would kill me… considering all the bad things I’ve done.”

 

Both Kaoru and Adam sighed, obviously inwards. ‘Ikari Shinji, saviour of Humanity, hiding for Humanity…’

 

Shinji chuckled sadly. “You make it sound as if it’s wrong, Adam…”

 

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Five days have passes, and it all went as Ritsuko has expected. Actually, Yui had recovered fully already on the fourth day. But Fuyutsuki decided to do everything on the fifth day, after all. Everyone was present.

 

“Just to make sure you know this… But I think that this is the best idea a Commander of NERV ever had.” Yui winked toward Fuyutsuki. His reaction was a small cough. Yui turned serious as she turned to walk towards Evangelion Unit-01’s Entry Plug.

 

The situation was very tense. Inside the people’s minds, prayers were heard. All were hoping that Shinji would be saved. But everyone wished there wouldn’t be a repeat of what happened before; that Yui would be absorbed and Shinji would come out.

 

But, as Yui was taking her steps, the ground beneath them shook uncontrollable, on some parts it even crumbled. Shigeru fell, and Maya helped him up. Shigeru scratched his head in embarrassment but didn’t have time to sulk as the ground shook again.

 

Fuyutsuki immediately activated the gigantic screen that he had let repair, but not before saying something. “Yui, it’s alright, enter Unit-01!!”

 

“Uh, what’s going on?!” Asuka yelled as she observed all the cracks in the walls and the crumbling floor. 

 

“Asuka, Rei… run as fast as you can towards your Evangelions!! It seems NERV is under attack!!” Misato yelled as she herself also ran to stand before the screen. ‘What is Fuyutsuki thinking? Is he releasing Unit-01?’

 

Ritsuko calmly walked the same way all the techs were running. ‘So, Today NERV will fall…. But even SEELE will have trouble with Shinji-kun… Let’s see what Yui can do… Three of our Evangelions up against SEELE…. It seems fair enough.’

 

“Evangelions… Launch!!”

 

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‘This is not like how I remember it… something is off… very off….’

 

Dead silence filled the entry plug… Yui watched as the other Evangelions had already had already taken their first steps. But Yui knew what could happen when she would move just an inch. This Evangelion might go berserk and a lot of innocents will lose their lives. Even if they just served SEELE. Yui watched as dozens and dozens of black-clothed people entered the NERV facility, ready to kill all in their way. Yui gritted her teeth and ordered Unit-01 to move.

 

And just then, as she expected.. Everything froze.

 

“He told me…. you are my mother…”

 

Yui froze as she faced a person who was floating in front of her. Yui didn’t know what to say as she saw a figure clothed in black/greyish clothes, his left eye completely bandaged with the same colour and a black headband covering his entire forehead. His entire body was covered, nothing but his right eye and his dark brown hair was revealed. Yui was still too shocked to be able speak as she saw the look in Shinji’s eyes.

 

“Adam’s telling me…. you could have prevented this from happening…. That you were the one that had started it all…”

 

Yui trembled as a tear left her left eye. She put her right hand in front of her mouth. She stood face to face with her son, and she was too afraid to even speak.

 

“Mother…. Why did you leave me? Why did you abandon me?”

 

Yui couldn’t answer; she was totally frozen in place. She couldn’t even think as she stared straight into Shinji’s eye.

 

“So….. now you won’t even talk to me… Am I that much of a disappointment to you? Don’t think I have forgiven you, mother.. I thought you were the only one who loved me, yet, what I believed was a lie, wasn’t it?”

 

A slight pause, as Shinji continued.

 

“It seems we don’t even have time to talk… I thank you so much for participating in this conversation, mother.”

 

And then Shinji vanished, giving his mother the view she had before, back. The view where there was total chaos everywhere. The two Evangelions were already fighting the White 05-13 SERIES of SEELE. Yui’s eyes widened at the dead bodies on the ground, the bloodied pavements. A voice suddenly rang all toughout the Entry-Plug

 

“Mother…. Right now… you can only watch… I will handle SEELE. I will kill, unfortunately. But truly, it is an eye for an eye. Once the Ceremony of the Third Impact begins, you’ll have to die as well…. The choice is mine to make… Perhaps everyone will be brought back to life… and.. perhaps not.” Shinji stated coldly. “I am terribly sorry, mother. But I have brought myself so far down, it’s best if I do the worst thing I can possibly do now… It’s ok if you hate me, in fact, you already did, didn’t you? And then again, everyone did..” Shinji began to rant but suddenly was stopped as Yui screamed.

 

“NOOOOOOO!!!!”

 

Shinji appeared in a split second in front of his mother. “… What is it? What’s wrong?”

 

“I…. I love you, Shinji… I’ve always loved you, Shin…Shin-chan..”

 

Shinji seemed to snarl, though it wasn’t visible since his entire face was covered. “A last attempt to save your own kind? I already know I’ve done so much wrong, I know the people hate me… why rub in lies I’ve heard before?” Shinji’s voice began to darken.

 

‘Shinji-kun, you’re losing control.’ Kaoru said inside Shinji’s head, sensing the darkness rise.

 

SHUT UP!!” Shinji yelled at Kaoru, it was clear he was a little mad.

 

Yui looked straight at the enraged Shinji, no longer afraid.

 

How dare you speak of love to me? I was the one that had been discarded, ignored and even beaten up several times, all in the name of.. LOVE.. Love for Humanity, huh? I don’t even know what love is. Don’t you dare repeat your lies!! I’m sick of it!! It is the reason I am like me right now!! Just shut the hell up and watch your son destroy humanity!!

 

‘What… I thought you were going to save Humanity?’

 

Shinji calmed down quite a bit as he answered Adam’s question. “I.. I know, Adam… I am so sorry.. but I just can’t forgive them for what they all have done to me… I just can’t… ”

 

Shinji suddenly showed his mother what had happened throughout his life as he made images appear throughout the Entry plug.

 

First… there was Yui’s absorption.. Father’s back.. No one that cared for Shinji after wards, until age 14 he was completely alone.. arrival Tokyo-III.. Confrontation with Gendo.. Battle against the Third Angel.. Toji who hit him twice in the face.. Rei who slapped him in the face.. Misato lecturing him wrongfully.. Gendo paying more attention to Rei… Asuka who slapped Shinji, several times.. Angel Attacks.. Toji’s demise..

 

Yui could barely hold back her tears as she saw all of it once. She stammered on her feet and coughed, making clear to Shinji she was on the brink of tears.

 

“Mother… it has come to this…. I guess all I can say is… it’s Payback Time..

 

“Wait, Shinji-kun…”

 

Don’t even try to speak in such a caring way!! The lies are dripping off of your words!!

 

Yui continued, unwavering. “No.. I’m not lying, Shinji.. Yes, you probably had the roughest life of everyone here… and yes, you were treated so badly.. I apologize with all my heart.. I apologize for Gendo.. I..” Yui dropped a few tears and approached Shinji, who backed away from her. “But I’m so sorry!! I’m so sorry, Shinji-kun!!” Yui jumped toward Shinji to hug him.

 

But Shinji stepped sideways to avoid his weeping mother. But he didn’t say anything as he watched her cry.

 

‘Shinji-kun… Can’t you sense it? The sincerity is radiating from the soul of her very presence. She isn’t lying, Shinji-kun.’

 

‘Yes. Tabris is quite right. It is not too late to have another choice, Shinji. Forgive them.. Forgive Humanity for what it has done to you..’

 

‘Yes, Shinji-kun… Be the bigger man, and show that Humanity still has faith left in itself. Act as Mankind’s representative. I know it’s hard to forgive them, but you can…’

 

“Kaoru-kun… Adam…”

 

Yui was a sobbing mess in the corner of the entry plug , until a hand reached her shoulder. Shinji embraced his mother, like a mother would do to her son. Yui hugged him back as hard as she could.

 

‘So, your choice has been made, then, Shinji-kun?’

 

“Adam.. Kaoru-kun.. prepare yourself for an entertaining battle, we don’t have much time left..”

 

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A/N: So what did you think of the story? Payback Time is finished, but actually, I already released the sequel.. It’s called Dark Happiness, you will find out what happened and what didn’t happen if you read it. Well, I’m signing off, God, I’m so tired, I typed this in one go… Oh well…. I hope you enjoyed the story. I know, I know, it’s a weird ending, huh? But hey, I like open endings. Oh, and if you think there wasn’t much of Asuka, Misato or Rei in here, don’t worry, there’ll be some romance in the sequel… but in an angst/dark fic… there just is no space for romance… well, sometimes… but not much..

 

Fare thee well,

TokehGecko